The final decision is done and said it out loud. I’m leaving. This was probably one of the biggest and hardest decisions I’ve done so far in my life but it had to be done. These thoughts, feelings and doubts have been little by little starting to kind of grow in my mind. And you know, you can’t fool yourself forever and stop your inner voice telling you that you are not anymore in the right place and you are not happy to the direction your life is going. A couple of years already I’ve felt that I can’t give Lordi anymore what it takes and what it needs. Not fully. And that’s not good for anybody, not to the band and not the fans. And not to myself of course either.
Now, it’s understandable, everybody wants to know “why, what’s the reason?” Unfortunately there’s not a simple black and white answer to that. Let’s just say that there were less and less plusses and an increasing amount of minuses for me to continue in the band anymore. Seven years I’ve been with Lordi, seven wonderful but also very demanding years. We’ve experienced our ups and downs and for sure Lordi has taught me many big lessons in life and given opportunities and chances that I could have only dreamt of before. And I forever appreciate it all. But now I guess I’ve become old I wanna stabilize my life. I want to get a better and balanced relationship with my work life, private life and free time. Maybe I still have also some other ambitions and dreams that I want to try to achieve in my life like songwriting. Also my body is demanding a break from my so beautiful but heavy costume.
Some of you already know that at the moment I’m spending most of my time in Italy where I have an interesting band house project going on and also quite a special guy to spend time with But I want to remind you that I’m such a tough chick that there ain’t no man or anybody for whom I would give up on my biggest dreams or career so don’t blame on anybody else about my decision. It was me who did it In any case hopefully I can let you to listen my new songs in the future, I’ll inform you the minute we’ll do anything worth publishing for. Hopefully soon!
Anyway, most importantly I want to thank you all monster maniacs for supporting me so overwhelmingly nicely all these past years. It’s been so great to see you in our shows rockin’ with us! The best thing has been to watch you all from the stage enjoying the show. And also I’m not forgetting how much you’ve been supporting and helping us to spread the word in different ways to keep this Lordi family tight, big and strong It has meant a lot I can tell you! Thanks also so much for all the gifts and letters and messages I’ve gotten from many of you during these years. Unfortunately it appeared to be impossible to answer back to all of you but it doesn’t mean that I didn’t see them all and appreciate them much! And the final last thanks also for your kind words for me now that I’m quitting. I will also miss you very much! Let’s keep in touch!!!
A very big thanks to Mr. Lordi, Amen, OX, Otus (R.I.P.), the new yet anonymous drummer monster Kita and Kalma. It has been quite a ride guys, hasn’t it?!?! Don’t forget me, we have too much in common!
Now boys and girls, let’s do it one more time in Simerock, Rovaniemi Finland 11th of August where the restless soul, her Countess Lady Awa will play her keyboards for the last time before she will vanish in the mist of damnation. Continuing her everlasting search to make the atonement and find peace.
It’s soon time to welcome the new lady monster on stage. All the be(a)st for you girl and most of all: enjoy the ride!!!